In 2023, a woman shared her story on the ‘Am I the A******’ subreddit about an incident with her husband’s six-year-old daughter.

The mother explained she has two boys, ages eight and ten, from a previous marriage. She became a stepmother to little Gwen when she married her husband, who is 40. Gwen spends two weekends a month with her stepfamily and the rest of the time with her biological mother. According to her stepmom, Gwen’s mom is quite fond of junk food, causing Gwen to be about 20 pounds heavier than she should be for her age.

“Our household focuses on healthy living. We teach moderation and make sure to keep our boys active every day,” she states.

During Gwen’s visits, the stepmom tries to instill the same healthy habits. “I encourage Gwen to learn about healthy eating and being active. We involve her in activities with the boys to keep her moving.”

Healthy eating, she explains, involves helping the children understand the difference between nutritious foods and treats. When one of the kids reaches for a treat in the pantry, she asks, “Would you like to make a healthier choice?” According to her, Gwen has started making better choices and even asks for fruit at home, which she considers a great improvement.

But Reddit users raged over her parenting style along with the food shaming.

“Providing healthy meals is great, but following the kids into the pantry and shaming them to pick something they don’t want isn’t,” one user commented.

Another user said, “At six years old, children don’t really understand calories, nor should they need to. It’s the parents’ job to provide healthy food, not force the child to choose it. This approach is just creating anxiety around eating for the child.”

Unhappy birthday

Gwen’s birthday happened to fall on one of her weekends with her father. Instead of having cake, the stepmom encouraged her to make a “healthier choice.”

“I didn’t think it was good for her to have more junk food, given what she eats at home. We agreed to have some low-fat ice cream instead, which Gwen loves and asks for every time she’s here, so she was happy with it,” the stepmother explained.

However, when Gwen returned to her mother, the stepmom received an angry phone call. Gwen’s mother said that when she asked Gwen about her birthday and the cake, Gwen started crying because she did want cake but felt she had to make a “good choice.” Gwen’s mother accused the stepmom of fat-shaming and demanded a cake and an apology.

‘Creating eating disorders’

Asking Reddit users for their opinion, the stepmom explained she never outright denied Gwen cake and was simply looking out for her health. She believed sticking to ice cream was a better choice.

However, the majority of Redditors thought otherwise, labeling her with “YTA******”

One Redditor commented, “She’s six. Let her have cake on her birthday and then go for a family walk after. Also, the good choice/bad choice talk is likely to give her lifelong body image issues.”

Another user said Gwen probably lied about wanting cake out of fear. “The fact that she didn’t feel comfortable expressing her true desire for her birthday says a lot. There’s more to this situation than what the stepmom is sharing.”

Another commenter, who had personal experience with eating disorders, warned that this kind of behavior is exactly how such disorders start in kids.

One more voice accused the stepmom of having a superiority complex, “She’s too caught up in her righteousness to realize she’s potentially creating eating disorders in those around her.”

Everyone deserves some cake on their birthday without feeling shamed!

What do you think about this situation? Share your thoughts and let’s hear from others as well!