I Choose Not to Make My Son Say “Sorry” and “Thank You” Because It Could Traumatize Him

Parenting is a journey filled with decisions, and each family navigates it in its own unique way. While some parents prefer a structured and disciplined approach, others emphasize empathy and understanding, allowing for more gentle guidance as children grow.

Emma, a thoughtful parent and one of our cherished readers, belongs to the latter group. She recently reached out to us to share how she’s raising her son and sought some feedback, as she often finds herself facing criticism for her unconventional style.

At 38, Emma decided it was time to break a cycle in her family, and she reached out to us with a touching letter:

“Hello, Bright Side. I’ve always admired your platform as a space for open and honest exchange. I’ve often engaged with the community here, contributing advice and insights. Now, I’m reaching out for some perspective on my own parenting journey with my son.”

Emma began by introducing her son, “My son, Georgie, is now 8 years old. Since I was young, I’ve dreamed of becoming a parent. When I discovered I was expecting, I pledged to myself to approach parenting with less confrontation and more understanding.”

Her parenting choices stem from her own upbringing.

Emma’s decision sprang from her personal experiences. “Growing up under my parents’ strict regimen, I learned first-hand the consequences of an authoritarian environment. It was hard for everyone in our home, not just me. The continuous pressure fostered anxiety and eroded my self-esteem, leaving my relationships with my parents strained.”

“It took years for me to fully comprehend how such an environment impacted my mental health. As I matured, I made a conscious effort to face these challenges head-on. To me, striking a balance between discipline and empathy is vital when raising children.

This is why I’ve committed to creating a nurturing space for my son, one that values love, mutual respect, and open dialogue. I wish to spare him the difficulties I encountered. Nevertheless, my husband and I often find ourselves at odds. He feels that Georgie should learn about social norms and understand the consequences of his behaviors.”