Once upon a time, a man met a beautiful lady and felt an instant connection. Without wasting any time, he decided to propose to her. But the lady had reservations. She said, “But we don’t know anything about each other!”
Unfazed, the man replied, “That’s okay. We’ll learn about each other as we go along.” And with her consent, they got married and went on a honeymoon to a luxurious resort.
During their honeymoon, while they were lounging by the pool, something extraordinary happened. The man got up, walked over to the 10-meter diving board, and effortlessly performed an impressive dive, leaving barely a ripple in the water. He executed flawless twists and turns with grace and precision. It turned out that he was an Olympic diving champion.
His new wife was amazed and exclaimed, “That was incredible!” The man chuckled and said, “I used to be an Olympic diving champion. See? We’re learning more about each other already.”
Inspired by her husband’s display of talent, she couldn’t resist the urge to showcase her own hidden skills. She jumped into the pool and started swimming laps at an astonishing speed. She glided through the water, effortlessly transitioning between freestyle, breaststroke, and even butterfly stroke. To everyone’s surprise, she had been an Olympic-level endurance swimmer.
Her husband was in awe and exclaimed, “That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?” To which she replied with a mischievous smile, “No, actually I was a hooker in Venice, and I worked both sides of the canal.”
In another part of town, a little old lady decided it was time to open a savings account at the Bank of Canada. Carrying a bag filled with money, she insisted on speaking with the bank’s president. The staff hesitated but eventually escorted her into the president’s office.
Curious about the substantial amount of cash she carried, the bank president asked her how much she wanted to deposit. Unveiling the contents of her bag, she dumped $165,000 onto his desk. The president was taken aback and asked where she had acquired such a large sum.
The old lady calmly replied, “I make bets.” Intrigued, the president inquired further, “What kind of bets?” The old woman smirked and said, “Well, for example, I’ll bet you $25,000 that your balls are square.”
The president burst into laughter and confidently declared, “That’s a stupid bet! You can never win that kind of bet!” The old lady, undeterred, challenged him by saying, “So, would you like to take my bet?”
Without hesitation, the president answered, “Sure, I’ll bet $25,000 that my balls are not square!” The little old lady proposed a condition, “Okay, but since there is a lot of money involved, may I bring my lawyer with me tomorrow at 10:00 A.M. as a witness?” Feeling confident, the president agreed.
That night, as the president contemplated the bet, doubt began to creep in. He spent a considerable amount of time in front of a mirror, carefully inspecting his testicles from every angle. He examined them closely, turning from side to side, making sure they were not square. He wanted to secure his victory.
The next morning, at precisely 10:00 A.M., the little old lady arrived at the president’s office accompanied by her lawyer. She introduced her lawyer to the president and restated the bet, “$25,000 says the president’s balls are square!”
Undeterred, the president confirmed the bet once again, and the old lady wasted no time. She asked him to drop his pants, wanting to see for herself. The president, feeling a mix of nerves and confidence, obliged.
As the little old lady examined his privates, she couldn’t help but notice the lawyer quietly banging his head against the wall. Perplexed, the president asked, “What the hell’s the matter with your lawyer?”
With a mischievous smile, the old lady replied, “Nothing, except I bet him $100,000 that at 10:00 A.M. today, I’d have the Bank of Canada’s president’s balls in my hand.”
