A woman facing a stressful situation in her five-year relationship sought advice from an online community after a big argument with her fiancé.
The conflict arose over money matters, causing her to question the dynamics of their relationship.
Sharing her experience on Reddit’s ‘Am I The A*****e‘ thread, the 32-year-old woman, referred to as the Original Poster (OP), explained that she got engaged to her 35-year-old partner after being together for five years. They had planned to tie the knot in May 2025.
Unfortunately, OP’s grandmother passed away shortly after their engagement.
OP mentioned that her grandparents had enjoyed successful careers and earned substantial incomes throughout their lives, leading to her receiving a “hugely generous” inheritance. This is where the argument began.
“When I told my fiancé about the inheritance, he seemed overly excited, which surprised me. I didn’t think much of it until later when I overheard him talking to his friends during a game. I heard him say, ‘I can pay my credit card off with that money, mate! We can finally take that boys’ holiday we’ve been planning!’ and he laughed,” OP wrote.
She continued, “I confronted him and asked, ‘What money?’ He looked at me strangely and said, ‘From your nan, babe.’”
She explained that she “immediately exploded” at him, firmly stating that he couldn’t use her inheritance without her consent, especially not for a boys’ holiday.
“‘It’s not your money; it’s written to me from MY nana. It’s not for you,’” OP recounted telling her fiancé.
This led to a heated argument, and OP left the room feeling upset. Later, her fiancé came to the kitchen and scolded her, saying, “We are getting married, you will become my financial BURDEN. Any money you take in is mine also. It was incredibly selfish of you to make such a fool out of me in front of my friends and giving them false hope of a holiday.”
OP wrote that she left the house without a word and went to stay at a friend’s place, then asked the online community if she had been wrong.
Her post received a flood of sympathetic and supportive responses from users.
One person commented, “He’s shown you he thinks of you as a burden and plans to spend money that isn’t his on his ‘boys’. He’s yelling at you because you won’t agree to his plans. It’s crazy if you marry him.”
Another chimed in, “Do you really want to marry this guy? He assumed he’s entitled to the money and planned to spend it on something that doesn’t include you. The second part is a bigger problem.”
A third user wrote, “Stop the wedding. Don’t marry this guy. First, he has unpaid credit card debt, showing a habit of living beyond his means. Second, he thinks what’s yours is his? Oh, honey, NO. And third, his rage and entitlement, calling you a burden? He exhibits classic Narcissist behavior. Your grandparents’ last gift wasn’t just the money but also the wisdom to see who he really is—abusive, entitled, and parasitic. Run.”
What do you think this woman should do? Share your thoughts in the comments!
